-329 Christmas Wrap up

Image by Filomena Scalise

Well it's taken me a few days to get to this post but I'm finally all rested up and feeling like myself again and ready to blog!

So I hosted Christmas Eve this year at my place and for the days leading up to it I scrubbed and cleaned and generally battled my perfectionism streak. It was the first time I've had Christmas Eve with my immediate family Devoted Dad, Marvelous Mum, Rock on Bro and His Better Half so I wanted it to be special. It was hard to navigate around some of the initial tension and awkwardness at first but later in the night when the Wii came out things loosened up and the night became fun. Marvelous Mum made sure we said grace before we ate ( the others don't go to Church ) and I think that was established as a tradition too. Which is one that I love. 

Christmas Day after Church the first wave of the migraines hit and instead of going to my Grandmother's for lunch briefly ( after speaking to Devoted Dad about it -340 Christmas Day Singledom , I decided that I should go for a bit ) I ended up sleeping for about 6 hours instead. So I then went to my cousin's house for dinner and had a nice afternoon/evening with her and the family ( gosh her kids are gorgeous ) and came home. 

Since then I've been battling migraines on and off and sleeping a lot. Which is fine because I'm on holidays and have no plans the next few days so while it's not ideal it's not inconvinent. 


I was talking to another single girl after Church on Sunday about her recent experience with a guy she had met online and I realised how much I've learned about online dating during the last however many years I've been attempting this thing on and off. She's at the stage where almost any guy will do and if they start the sex conversations ( i.e how far have you gone, how far will you go before marriage ) on the first date or even the first chat she might be uncomfortable but she will answer their questions. Or if they only have trial memberships or want her to communicate outside the dating site within days of communicating then she is ok with that too. Or if they haven't been to Church in a while or are a completely different denomination she is open to meeting them. 

Actually I am ok with that last one as she seems to manage to get them to visit our Church a lot so it's not a bad thing......;)


I started to wonder if I'm a bit too picky and have too many "rules" so I've thought about some of my "rules" that I've never sat down and specifically made up but over time through experience have come up with.

So some of my rules ( off the top of my head are )

• I don't get into the sex conversations and I am put off if it comes up. That kind of discussion shouldn't need to come up until you are in an actual relationship with that person.
• Him trying to share of his sexual past is a waving of a red flag in front of my face. It tells me that he is either still in that place or wants to be. Next or slow right down. 
• If he wants to communicate outside the site within the first few chats it tells me that he's not willing to pay for membership and therefore really isn't serious about finding someone. I know it's not cheap to do online dating long term but it's not going to break the budget either. Cut back on pizza for a few weeks. ;)
• Compliment me on my appearance and that is all you do screams scammer to me. I am very very careful.
• I don't give out my last name for ages and I don't add them to facebook unless I think that they will be on facebook as a friend (or more) for a while. And they get limited access. Have to protect my friend's privacy as much as my own. 
• If we don't have a decent chat about God or faith in the first few conversations then I'll try and initate one. If it doesn't become clear he has a relationship with God then I will ask but I'll become less interested. Usually by then he has become a lot less interested in me. I wonder why?! Lol.

I think that on reflection I might be a bit too limiting in my ideas on denomination or Church attendance without knowing their particular unique story but as for the rest I think my ideas are weeding out the non serious or the ones that are mostly looking for a quick hook up rather than a potential relationship. 

And since things seem to be going quite well with Bachelor #4 so far I am inclined to keep to my "rules". We are now emailing and building a good, solid friendship I think. Slow and steady. But you can never tell with these things. We shall see. :)

xMiss365

-332 & -331 Christmas

Merry Christmas everyone! I hope you had a lovely day and got a moment or two to look around you and see the glitter scattered blessings around you today. 

 

A friend of mine spoke today in Church about the symbolism behind the Candy Cane and even though there can be many ways to see symbolism in everyday objects, I like the simplicity of this one. 

It's almost midnight here in Sydney and I have to get to bed. Have Church again tomorrow morning so no snoozing in for me ;)

Merry Christmas - mwah !

xMiss365

-340 Chistmas Day Singledom

Some facts before I begin my musings tonight...

• I have 22 cousins
• More than 50% of them are either married or in long term relationships
• 5 of them are under 20 years old so even though they are in the 50% of unmarried/long term relationship they muck up my stats. So it's a lot worse.....*sigh*

If I go to the small Christmas Day gathering I am once again declaring that I am still single, unpartnered and unmarried as every single other cousin will be either with their spouses family, immediate family group or boyfriend/girlfriend's family on Christmas Day. Trouble is after I go to Church I don't really have any where else I need to be. My parent's will understand ( if I explain it properly rather than make up an excuse perhaps ) but *sigh* it requires an explanation. 


Now before you worry that I won't be celebrating Christmas, I will be. Christmas Eve is at my place this year with Devoted Dad, Marvellous Mum, Rock On Bro & His Better Half which will be great but yes, I really don't want to do the "only cousin who is unpartnered going to Christmas Day" thing again this year. *sigh* 


And to think I used to complain about having to do the drive up the coast on Christmas morning to get to lunch at The Real Ex's parent's place. The things I used to take for granted. *sigh* 


xMiss365 *sigh*

-352 It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas

Photo by Suat Eman

It's time to put up the Christmas tree which is something I didn't do last year since I was lazy and couldn't be bothered. Before you gasp and tut tut tut at me I did put lights in the window I just couldn't be bothered to take down the tree from the top of the wardrobe just for me to look at! ;)

This year I am having Christmas eve with my immediate family at my flat so not only do I want to have the decorations up I need to clean the flat properly. *sigh* 

I inwardly complain that I rarely get invited over for dinner or whatever to other people's places and blame it on being single. And while to some degree it's true, like my birthday evening most people assumed that I would be spending it with someone else, I haven't opened my home to others in a long time. 

Then he turned to the host. "The next time you put on a dinner, don't just invite your friends and family and rich neighbors, the kind of people who will return the favor. Invite some people who never get invited out, the misfits from the wrong side of the tracks. You'll be—and experience—a blessing. They won't be able to return the favor, but the favor will be returned—oh, how it will be returned!—at the resurrection of God's people."Luke 14:12-14 (The Message)

And while that verse is encouraging me to invite over those that won't be able to give me an invite back, it also reminds me that if I invite others over they will more than likely return the favour. ( Or at least I will have people over and won't be sitting on my own on a Friday or Saturday night ). ;)

It's just getting the motivation to do it I guess. This year has been a shocking year for me health wise and while I finally have an answer it has meant that a vast majority of my free weekends have been on the lounge or in bed sleeping. Not tidying or cleaning. I have a lot of work to do before Christmas eve.

But the tree is up, the Christmas lights are all aglow and while I was going to watch 'The Year Without Santa Claus' while I did it ( I am Team Heat Miser all the way ! ) Anne of Green Gables was on TV and I watched that instead....although I did mute the tv when Matthew died *sob* 

Only 21 days till Christmas!

xMiss365