And so on the eve of my 40th Birthday I have decided to open this blog again and document what is going to be my most interesting, stretching, scary, exciting year yet! Carry on.... ;)
How did I get here anyway?
So from the ages of 15-24 and a half I was in a relationship with my High School Sweetheart ( aka The Real Ex /The Non Bachelor). While he was my best friend and we experienced many firsts together ( not first kiss but pretty much everything else ) our relationship was bigger than our bodies - to quote a John Mayer song. It was intense and highly emotional and sadly when you pair that with limited life experience and a whole mix of self esteem and emotional issues ( Shame - me, Anger - him ) you get a big old mess of fighting, getting back together, emotional abuse, physical abuse, lying, cheating and a rollercoaster of pain. And then there was the laughter, joy, fun, connection, hugs, kisses, love and so much more.
At the age of 21 we were wooed by God and for a while things were good. Then life happened and he walked away ( into the arms of the one he would marry within the next year and a half & now is currently separated from ) and I step by step, piece by piece was lovingly walked into the life I have now by my Creator, my Saviour, my Father. I had to start my life again, the only thing that was left from my life with the Real Ex was the Church we attended and God slowly gave me the friends and life that I now treasure - a life so different that The Real Ex/The Non Bachelor is still trying to wrap his head around it ;)
Being with The Real Ex/The Non Bachelor until my mid twenties meant that I never worked out what it meant to go out with other guys or navigate crushes so all this I had to learn in my mid twenties and thirties. Add to this trying to work out how to do this as a Christian is even more interesting. And confusing. A lot more confusing.
So lets just say there have been some experiences. And I've learned from each one. I know through all of this that I am a little too guarded with guys and that I want to be pursued by someone who I want to be pursued by :)
But most importantly I want to be with the man that God intends me to be with. And not reek of desperation while I am living a fabulous life waiting ;)
So to read my blog click here.
To find out who is who click here.
To read my ongoing list of 365 good things about being single click here.
To read the very first post click here.
To read some of my favourite posts click here.
To start reading from the night I left my 30s and entered the brave new world of my 40's click here.
Or you can just go to the tabs at the top ;)